There are 3 very
simple steps that you have to take (I say steps, pun intended, because you
really have to walk for this) to
straighten your hair and keep it straightened for the rest of your life.
First is to take
a walk at midnight.
Next is to walk
into a crematorium
Third is to walk
into a ghost
Your hair will
stand straight on end with fright. The word here is straight. Got it?
To make sure
that this happens, you must put your fingers into your mouth, open your eyes
wide, and scream so loud that your hair
continues to stands straight on end with fright. Don’t worry, no one will hear
you or blame you for waking them up. Except the ghost, but you won’t care about
that by then.
Then you must
turn and run for your life. What happens now is that the wind will go through
your sweat-soaked hair (due to the running) and make it fall limp on your sides.
When you reach
home, shut the door, smile (victoriously) and comb out your forever straightened
hair.
It does not
matter whether you are a girl or a boy, a woman or a man, whether you have very
curly or just simply wavy hair. After this, your hair will be straight forever.
If you are dis-satisfied (though I doubt it), you are welcome to repeat the
experience once again.
Benefits: This
is a natural process.
It costs absolutely nothing.
It requires no repeats (99.9% foolproof)
Spoiler alert: This
is not for the faint-hearted. However, if you are a faint-hearted guy, you will
never win that fair lady (translate to ‘hot babe’ in today’s language, dude). Whether
your hair is straight or not then it does not matter. Give up already.
If you are a
faint-hearted girl, you will be happy to have any kind of hair and hope for the
best, you will not be adventurous, daring, or aiming to get those smooth locks
at any cost. you are out of the reckoning already.
But if you are
willing to go to any lengths (and I do mean lengths of hair here), to get that
straight-as-silk hair with not a single curl in it, don’t get frazzled. Just curl
your lip and go for that midnight walk, follow the process outlined, and see
how your hair falls after that: straighter, longer, silkier. Sweet and Natural.
No artificial sweeteners added.
People will
crowd around you asking how you did it. Tell them it requires guts and that you
have it. And rake in the glory.
Added benefits: Nothing
can scare you now. You may also now carry a certain wide-eyed look which some
people fall for immediately.
How do I know?
Look at my hair and it is proof enough. Don’t believe me? I’ll walk with you at
midnight. Promise. But don’t walk through me when you reach the crematorium,
there are other ghosts.
*****
This is posted for the SUNSILK Straight Hair Experiment Competition at indiblogger .
